Funny email I received...if you forward, no one reads!!

An Aphorism is a statement of truth or opinion expressed in a concise and witty manner.  The term is often applied to philosophical, moral and literary principles.

Some examples: Some hit too close to home!!

♦ I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year.  Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number? ♦ I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you. ♦ When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body.  Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts. ♦Relationships are a lot like algebra.  Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y? ♦America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote. ♦ You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone?  That's your common sense leaving your body. ♦ My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.  We'll see about that. ♦ I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on her computer.  I saw it through my telescope last night. ♦ Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye. ♦ You're not fat, you're just easier to see. ♦ If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple of payments. ♦ I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters.  Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?" ♦ I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor." ♦ Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us,"  If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!  ♦ The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient. ♦ I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.    ♦ Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch! ♦ The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single.  The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk. Now, don’t you feel better knowing what an aphorism is?